Post Date December, 03 2023
Hello Dr. Li! I really don't know what kind of lifestyle I am currently in. I am a typical leftover woman, and in the eyes of outsiders, my appearance and job are both very good, so I have high requirements for finding a partner. However, in reality, I don't have that many requirements. I have always hoped for someone who truly loves me. Just last year, my classmate accidentally met a boy and introduced him to me. After meeting him, I felt pretty good and started talking, and we talked very well. In terms of personality, we got along well because we were not young anymore and didn't just talk. Gradually, we started thinking about getting married. He was also a typical Phoenix man who lived in a far northern rural area and worked hard to get into the south, I passed the exam and entered a public institution. He has no money, let alone a house and a car, but I have a house and a car, and in the eyes of outsiders, he has taken advantage of my superior conditions. Under the pressure of real-life problems, I have been wandering, and just as I was wandering, an unexpected thing happened. I have always believed that he loves me very much, and he has kept it since the first message I sent him. I never thought he would betray me, but the truth is so heartless. One of my girlfriends told me that he once had feelings for her, and she thought he just liked the conditions, and her conditions were superior to mine. I questioned him, but he just didn't admit it. I didn't want to be bothered by this kind of thing, so I proposed to break up. Although I felt very uncomfortable in my heart, I still couldn't accept it happening. After proposing a breakup, he still came to me and persisted for five months. He said he was innocent, so he would persist. He believed that his sincerity would one day resolve the misunderstanding in my heart. I am really moved by him like this. Every time I see his pitiful appearance when he comes to see me, I feel very uncomfortable. My tears are almost dry for this matter, but every time I see him, I still can't help it. I can see that he is also very distressed. A few times, his tears have also been in his eyes. He said he won't cry, he will definitely be able to get through this difficult situation. He said he has no money, But having a genuine heart can definitely help us face real problems, and all problems can be solved. But when I really decided to start over with him, I didn't have the courage again. I was really afraid that he just liked my conditions. Teacher, I am really annoyed. I really want to give up, but I still can't let him go in my heart. Being with him really makes me feel spoiled and happy to be with him. How should I make a decision?
comment:
I fully understand your tortured and contradictory emotions. I can see that you still love him very much, that's why it's so painful. Perhaps he did have feelings for your girlfriend before, or maybe she was deceiving you because she was jealous of your love, and he never pursued her. No matter what has happened before, it is a thing of the past and there is no need to verify it. The key is that now he is persistently pursuing you, and you also like him very much. Whether the other party only chooses you based on superior conditions, you should be able to get the answer in the process of getting along. Rather bully an old man than a poor young man. Don't just look at the financial situation in front of the other person. As long as their knowledge and abilities are good, there is a lot of room for appreciation. Why worry about not surpassing your financial conditions? At the crossroads of love, one should choose carefully and not worry too much. There is no perfect person, and one should not pursue perfection too much. I hope you can grasp the love that belongs to you.
