In our traditional Chinese concept, sex is a very private and unseemly thing, which must be done secretly behind closed doors. Even in our Criminal Law, there is a crime called "the crime of gathering people to commit adultery", that is, sexual activities involving more than three people at the same time are subject to legal sanctions.
In this way of thinking, people should like to turn off the lights and roll the sheets. In fact, an online survey was conducted in an online forum. Among more than 200 participants, some chose to "turn on the light", and this choice has no direct relationship with the length of marriage.
The author speculates that most of the people who participated in this survey are men, because men prefer to turn on the light when rolling sheets. They like to turn on the light because:
First of all, because a large part of male sexual stimulation comes from vision. If you can clearly see your partner's body, expression, eyes and various reactions, you can better stimulate and strengthen male desire and feeling. Especially when he is rolling sheets with his beloved woman, looking at the other side's face can make him have a stronger sense of conquest and satisfaction.
The second reason why they like to turn on the light when rolling the bed sheet is that they think that the bed is a good place to meet each other frankly. Turning on the light will naturally show this kind of honesty without reservation. Those men who are very confident about their bodies are more willing to turn on the light to let their female partners appreciate the beauty of their bodies, especially to let their female partners see how good their performance is.
The third reason is that men's confidence is a bit undermined. Because men's bodies are not sensitive enough, or because they use their left brain more for logical thinking and analytical reasoning, which reduces their body sensitivity. At the same time, because men are more purposeful about sex, many people only pursue the pleasure of a few seconds, so some people rush to the final goal. Such physiological and psychological characteristics make them too lazy to cultivate their own sexy feelings slowly, but in order to achieve the goal of quickly pleasing themselves, they have to use bright lights to stimulate their nerves, so that they can quickly excite themselves and show their virility bravely.
Why did he have to play at night when he knew it was fake?
Lei has a foreign trade company of his own. Because of business dealings, he often accompanies customers to nightclubs. But he admitted that he also liked to go there. It was often his initiative to take customers to the nightclub to "see and see". In fact, he is not really interested in the women there. He knows that all the personal information they provide is false, and what they say and do is only for professional needs, which is understandable. But understanding doesn't mean accepting, so he never spends money on sex, and more often he just drinks and chats with them. He was happy with his choice. "At least I don't have to worry about spreading the disease to my wife. From this point of view, I am responsible."
However, his wife did not buy into his responsible behavior. She quarreled with him many times. Once, she rushed to the private room of the nightclub in person and found him out in front of the customer. It was very embarrassing. But Lei found that he really couldn't change this habit. He really liked the feeling in the nightclub. He couldn't make up his mind even considering his wife's feelings.
What's wrong with Lei? He knew that there would be no true love in the nightclub, but he could not give up his nostalgia for it. Since he doesn't want to buy sex, and he knows that everyone is playing tricks on the spot, what is the attraction of romantic places to Lei?
That's because what Lei wants in the romantic place is not feelings, but the sense of success that he spends a lot of money there. At the same time, he will also get a sense of being respected which is false but direct and explicit.
Imagine that Lei has just entered the gate of the nightclub. As a regular visitor, he will naturally be warmly welcomed by the beautiful women. They will praise him with flowery smiles and treat him as a guest of honor. All of these can make Lei experience Wang's sense of success. It seems that all of these are his own. How attractive it is for those who need to rely on external reactions to prove their success!
Secondly, surrounded by a group of beautiful women in the nightclub, Lei will experience the power and glory of men - having a lot of heterosexuals and having control over them, which is a deep desire of every man.
Although Lei Ming knows that these beauties are professional needs, so they can show respect and obedience to themselves, at least in the hours spent in the nightclub, they can be at their disposal. This is enough, because he spent money to buy it. Isn't it the feeling of Wang in these hours?
Surrounded by beautiful women, Lei will have an illusion of reaching the peak of power and glory, which makes him intoxicated and nostalgic. So what he can't quit is not nightclub, but this feeling.
Finally, the dim light of the nightclub casts a warm atmosphere, which is permeated with a sense of friendliness and comfort everywhere, making Lei feel that he can enjoy a fully relaxed and semi-anesthetic state, and can temporarily forget the disturbance and pressure of the day, so as to achieve a "withdrawal" state.
The nightclub can provide Lei with a space for transition between family and company, and the decoration and feeling inside are completely different from his living space. It seems that once he enters the nightclub, he will be temporarily separated from the real society and come to a rational country that can be considered and analyzed without too much. This allows him to feel free for a moment, temporarily remove the social roles and social masks of husband, son, father, brother, friend, boss, and so on, so as to get a free state that can completely be himself.