My husband betrayed me by playing online dating and opening a house with a female college student

I have been married for nine years and have been together since then. My husband chatted online, fell in love online, and was eventually caught by me having sex with a female college student. I was supposed to get divorced, but I found out I was pregnant and his family knew about him. He refused to divorce and admitted his mistake. He has also performed well in the past year.

I was about to give birth when I suddenly noticed a woman sending him an intimate text message. I asked him, but he started arguing with me, saying that I was making trouble, that I was unhappy all day, and scolding me for my bad morals. Saying I don't even want to talk to you, I'm arguing and kicking you to death. Ask him, he said that the woman is from his village. I remember that the woman is either his netizen or his classmate.

When I discovered the problem with his phone, I opened it and later set a password to prevent it from being viewed. Today, I found a text message from that woman. I asked for her phone and she immediately deleted it before giving it to me. Because I asked him for a reason, he couldn't say it and started arguing.

I don't want to know if that woman is his classmate or a netizen now. I really can't bear the arguments he said, I really don't know what to do. I really hate my daughter and take her out to work until she's three years old. I didn't come back until I'm nine years old. I feel sorry for her. If she gets divorced now, I don't know how the child will live.

My sister learned about my husband's situation. Originally, his family was very selfish and had many things to do. My family didn't look up to them, and now they all have opinions about me. I don't want my family to be angry with me anymore, but I really can't bear to have a child, let alone give birth again soon. But when he thinks about it in the future, if he persists, my two children will suffer even more. He still likes boys, and now he is pregnant with another daughter, he is a bit unhappy. My eldest daughter has a bad relationship with him, and he wants to ease things up, but he lacks patience, and the result is getting worse and worse.

Faced with such a father and husband, I really despair, but what should I do with the child in my belly?

reply:

The most taboo thing about marriage is to gather less and leave more, because the lengthening of distance often makes the relationship pale and cold; The most important thing for couples is to be together, because companionship is the longest confession of love, and more companionship can promote mutual affection.

You said that you have been married for nine years and have been getting together less and leaving more. How can such a marriage not go wrong. In addition to being together frequently, couples also need to have good communication and understand how to establish good intimate relationships at all times. Do you have these? If not, there is only what you are busy with, and what I am busy with. I live at the head of the Yangtze River, and you live at the end of the Yangtze River. I miss you all night, but I don't see you. Isn't living like this every day a torture? You can tolerate such days, not take such a life seriously, and also be able to maintain a clean lifestyle, but your husband may not necessarily be. You should know that men are animals with lower body thinking. Will they be honest outside? Once there is a lack of moral bottom line and sense of responsibility, one will naturally indulge oneself under "no supervision".

Your husband refused to divorce after betraying you, indicating that he doesn't want to give up this marriage and family. However, from his performance, he doesn't intend to completely repent. He just hopes that you don't interfere too much with him, and it's best to turn a blind eye to his behavior. His true mentality is the true mentality of most men: the red flag at home is not falling, and the colorful flag is flying outside! The basic idea behind most men's infidelity is to have a playful mindset. The reason why your husband dares to roar at you and disrespect you is because he sees through your bottom line and knows where your weakness lies, which is that you cannot let go of your children. This is also the weakness of most women. Women often choose to compromise and endure humiliation at critical moments due to their softness and concern for their children, invisibly allowing men to continue indulging and falling.

Therefore, as a woman, when dealing with men's infidelity and infidelity, it is important to understand how to deal with the situation based on the facts. It is important to look at the other person's attitude towards admitting their mistake and their specific performance afterwards. Based on this, one should consider the constraints of their children and other practical factors, and not easily give up their bottom line and principles just because of their children. I have said more than once that women should not use children to bind their marriage, which is unfair to themselves and not necessarily good for children. It is not a wise idea. Of course, children are indeed innocent. No matter how you choose, you must protect their interests and not let them be harmed.

As for you, you already have two children, one is nine years old and the other is about to give birth. In this situation, choosing to divorce is not a suitable time. If it's really difficult, then choose the strategy of delaying action. For the time being, choose to preserve the integrity of your marriage and make ends meet, provided that he can afford the expenses of family life for you. If he can provide necessary financial support for you and your children, then choose to endure first. After all, you are currently facing a very realistic survival problem. When your child is born and grows older, you can work and earn money normally. Then, based on your husband's specific performance, you can decide whether to go or stay. This period serves as a buffer period for your husband and wife to adapt and test each other. Let's see if with the arrival of your little life in your belly, you can awaken his maturity, conscience, responsibility, and responsibility as a father, After all, he has also had good performances before.